Sunday, September 19th

Dear Dan,

I left home last night. I'm sorry but I just couldn't handle Wudaokou anymore. How do you stand it? Besides, you wouldn't believe the stuff that fat tiger you put next to me in the cupboard says when you aren't around. I was really starting to lose my sense of self; to forget my paleolithic roots. I want to roam the streets, chew the leaves, smell the flowers! Believe me, this is the best thing for both of us.

Yours truly,

Leo, the Liaoning dinosaur

Monday, September 20th

Dear Dan,

I tried to make a friend today. Do you think she likes me?

yours truly,

Leo, the Liaoning dinosaur

Tuesday, September 21st

Dear Dan,

Have you ever had tapas? Probably, you always did get like to get your food on. I wish you could have been here to sample this platter, though it's probably best that you missed the fecund sewage smell that accompanied the meal. Turns out scorpions aren't the only downside to courtyard living, heh heh.

I'm having a great time out in the world - I can't stop smiling!

yours truly,

Leo, the Liaoning dinosaur

Wednesday, September 22nd (中秋节)

Dear Dan,

The mooncakes were TOTALLY not worth this shit.

yours truly,

Leo, the Liaoning dinosaur

Thursday, September 23rd

Dear Dan,

Hoo boy, this time I definitely made a friend! Everything happened so fast and I'm a little nervous about what to expect. I mean, he seems to really like me and I'm not even sure if I have a gender, let alone how I feel about dating a carnivore. But gosh, I just feel so safe with him. Someone told me he can be a little temperamental but I think she was just jealous. Is it too early to ask him if he thinks we should move in together? Please advise.

yours truly,

Leo, the Liaoning dinosaur

Friday, September 24th

Dear Dan,

You're right about one thing: learning characters pretty much blows.

yours truly,

Leo, the Liaoning dinosaur

Saturday, September 25th

Dear Dan,

I didn't leave the house today because I was afraid I'd see you out and about in the old neighborhood. I guess I'm a little afraid you'll make me go back to that horrible laminate cabinet in that dark dark corner of the city; but more than that I think I'm afraid you'll never even notice I've left. What happened to us Dan? I thought I meant something to you. Would you have preferred to bring home a miniature version of that winged dinosaur you got so excited about at the museum? Well I've got news for you - he wouldn't have been nearly as cute as ME.

Yours truly,
Leo, the Liaoning dinosaur

P.S. I heard you got some dirty grass horses or something. If you think you're going to make me jealous you've got a lot to learn. I'm more than a politically charged internet meme - I'M A GODDAMN GIANT OF PREHISTORY!